We have always heard, or even uttered, the phrase “it takes a village to raise a child.”
This week during Teacher Appreciation Week, I’ve been thinking more about my roles as a teacher, as a parent and how they go hand-in-hand.
{Now this is all my opinion and I understand that there may be other opinions out there}.
Role of a Parent
I believe that it is the role of a parent from day one to be a child’s first educator. A parent is someone who teaches his/her child right from wrong, how to act with other children, how to respect other adults and most other social skills.
I believe that a parent should be just that, a parent. You are not your child’s friend {I’m not saying you can’t be. My mom is one of my best friends, but it took us years before we got there}. Your child will have so many friends, but he/she will only have {at the least} 1-2 parents to teach them how to survive in this world as a decent human being.
Your child needs an authority figure in his/her life. If you choose to be his/her friend, who will be there to give them some boundaries?? You chose to have kids, your kids didn’t choose you to be their parent. You need to make the sacrifices, not them. {I love this Kristina Kuzmic’s videos! Not only is she funny, she also tells the truth! Check out these videos “I’m Not Your Friend, Because I Love You,” or “Not Your Friend, Kid, But Always Your Ally”}.
Do I sound like a jerk for saying these things? Some may think so. How dare I say you’re not your child’s friend and that you should just play the role of parent {the nerve of me}! I’m sorry, but who else is going to teach your child the things he/she needs to know?
I believe that some, not all, parents have gotten so concerned about being their child’s friend that they’ve forgotten how to be a parent.
Some parents haven’t shown the consequences for a child when he/she has done something wrong, in the fear that the child will “hate” them. Yes, I probably don’t understand just yet the hurt a parent feels when they hear their child says “I hate you” {and I’m sure my heart will feel like it broke if I ever hear those words from Bryan} for the first time because my son isn’t even old enough to say “mommy,” but is it better to hear those words just for a fleeting second in a moment of anger or is better to see your child misbehaving and throwing tantrums every time he/she doesn’t get what he/she wants {some will even do it in public, they don’t care where they are}??
They’re so concerned with giving their children the best that they forget that 
sometimes giving a child what they want, may not be what they need.
Let’s not forget the parents who are doing everything they can to teach their children though, because those parents do exist!
I’ve only been a parent for a month and a half and I’ve been home all the time. In time I’ll learn what it takes to be a parent and also go to work {I’m not saying that being a stay-at-home parent isn’t a job in itself. Check out our post “Parenting is a Full-Time Job”}.
The parents who can balance their jobs outside of the home and their job as a parent are incredible! How my mom did it for the years when my dad was traveling so much for work, I have no idea! Between finding time to bathe us, drop us off at school, feed us, working full-time and finding time to take care of herself, it amazes me at all the sacrifices she had to make {and still makes with full grown children} without asking for anything in return.
Role of a Teacher
I believe that it’s a teacher’s job to do more than just teach academics. A teacher should be able to teach {more like enhance} the social skills that parents have already taught their children at home.
I believe a teacher shouldn’t be the first person to show a child how to behave in a public setting or how to treat others {although there are some parents who say otherwise…I’ve had some of those}.
I have met and known so many parents who have blamed their child’s teacher for their child failing in school or in a social setting. I’m sorry, but I don’t believe that teachers should be blamed at all for a child failing, not entirely at least.
Homework is sent home for a reason…to strengthen the child’s understanding of what was taught in class {and a parent should be able to work with the child at home, not brush it aside like it’s meaningless busy work}. Do you think your child’s teacher sends homework home just because he/she likes to grade papers? No! At least I know I didn’t!
Parent-teacher conferences happen for a reason-for parents and teachers to communicate with each other! Do you think we just sit around after school everyday waiting for parents to come talk to us?? No! We have lives at home too, we have kids, we have spouses, we have responsibilities that aren’t just your children!
It takes so much time to plan and grade homework and schedule conferences that it makes me so frustrated to hear some parents say that homework and meeting with their child’s teacher is pointless and a waste of time. {Thank you, you just told me that I wasted my weekend planning these lessons for your child}.
I know that, as a teacher, I treated each of my students as if they were my own kids. How would I want society to view them when they left my classroom? What did I want them to learn from me? How could I work with the parents in my class to help our kids learn to their fullest potential?
Working Together
Honestly, I may be talking more from a teacher’s point of view because I’ve only been a parent for so long and I’m still learning, but I do believe that parents and teachers can and should work together to give their kids the best opportunities to succeed in life.
I understand that a teacher may be spending 8 hours a day with your child, but a parent is the one constant in a child’s life {your child’s teacher could also have a child of their own that they spend less time with because they’re in a classroom with your child most of the week}. Some parents fear that their child’s teacher doesn’t want to hear the suggestions they have to help their kids and vice versa.
It’s not just up to be parents to teach kids, but it’s also not all on a teacher either.
Don’t blame your child’s teacher if your child is failing. What are you doing, or not doing, at home to help your child?
Don’t blame your student’s parent if your student’s social skills aren’t where they should be. What kind of environment are you creating in your classroom? What can you do to help enhance what has been taught already?
There should be an open line of communication.
This week, parents remember to thank your child’s teacher for all they have done to help your child this week. But teachers, also thank your student’s parents for doing all they have to raise such an incredible person.
Happy Teacher’s Appreciation Week!! I’m curious what opinions are out there! Leave your comments below! 😉